Here are four recent book reviews. (Visit this link for all my book reviews http://tim223.xanga.com/category/book-reviews/ )
The Art of Neighboring, by Jay Pathak and Dave Runyon
This is a great book, about reaching out to build friendships with neighbors, and ultimately show not only the love of Christ to them, but possibly also eventually share the specific message (gospel) of Christ with them too. The book points out that we often don't know our neighbors. It shares the importance of knowing them, and provides practical ideas for getting to know them. It talks a lot about our attitude... loving, respectful, not arrogant (willing to ask/receive help from neighbors)... How to overcome fear... etc. It has a lot of stories from their own experiences in Denver. It also has good advice for relationships in general, such as their chapters on establishing boundaries, and forgiveness, and focusing on specific 'people of peace', etc. Interesting ideas for group neighborhood fellowship: outdoor movie nights, picnics, block parties. Recommended book!
True Love Dates, by Debra Fileta
This is a fairly typical Christian dating advice book. It gives all the standard and common-sense (if sometimes cliche) Christian dating & relationships advice. She organizes her points as follows: 1. Date inward (get to know yourself), 2. Date outward (get to know other people), and 3. Date upward (cultivate your relationship with Jesus Christ). Point #1 was the most unusual... she recommends spending plenty of time, money, energy, effort, etc in getting to know oneself. She has a section in chapter 12 called "Jesus can't be your boyfriend" in which she inveighs against the commonly-given Christian advice that Jesus ought to satisfy all romantic longings. However, she tends to get very close to doling out that same advice herself, in many places. It is a hard line to walk correctly, because she's right - God did design most people for marriage relationships, but marriage will never ultimately satisfy. Overall I partially recommend this book... it is fairly good and might be helpful to some people, especially those who have not read other Christian relationship books.
Rid of My Disgrace, by Justin and Lindsey Holcomb
This book is about sexual assault, and in particular a Christian counseling response to it. It starts by giving stats/etc about sexual assault (and helping victims to name/recognize it for what it was), then spends several chapters talking about the shame, guilt, disgrace, etc that victims usually feel, including real life stories. Then there are some chapters at the end about God's grace as shown in the Old Testament and New Testament. Overall this is a good, balanced, book (including both the psychological/counseling perspective and the Biblical perspective). I think this might be worth using as a discussion starter in counseling someone who has been hurt. Here's an excerpt from the chapter called "Mandy's Story." " [7 years afterward]....I began to see the fullness of the evil done against me. Progressively, as the magnitude of the evil grew in my awareness, it was amazing for me to realize that God is even bigger. .... Following Him through that dark valley and resting in His real promises rather than my own ideas became the true healing that I needed. I came to know the true God, sovereign over all, who is ultimately good. And I was his daughter, cherished and loved by him even in the midst of being raped. When I reached that point, my heart was soft toward God, and I asked him what else he had for me. I remember driving to work saying, "Is there more, here?" And that's when it hit me. I saw their faces. I saw the men who raped me and felt a surprising compassion towards them. I began to cry out for them, "God save them." Just as I was an enemy of God in need of reconciliation, so they need to be reconciled by the blood of Christ. I wept for them for quite a while and still often find myself tearing up on their behalf, wishing that I could see them face-to-face and tell them of a great God who is bigger than their harmful acts of violence, who loves them to the point of crushing his own Son to deliver them from death. This forgiveness was a miracle. I have found freedom in loving them with the love of Christ. My anger, bitterness, resentment, escape, numbness, denial, self-pity, or any other response is not capable of removing their sin. Nothing but the blood of Christ will pay their debt. And so I can look back on that night, recognizing the fullness of the pain God counted me worthy to suffer, and also to look on it with the joy of knowing my God in a more intimate and magnificent way. It has become a mark of God's help in my life, a place where he ordained healing for me ......."
Shame Interrupted, by Edward Welch
This is a fascinating book. It is a thorough, 300-page, study of shame (and honor & healing). What is shame? (there are several types... due to our sin or due to our weakness/inadequacy... foisted upon us by others or imposed upon ourselves... etc) Why do we feel it? What are the sources? And especially, how did/does God address and 'interrupt' and heal our shame, in various different ways, throughout the Bible? Very unusual book in terms of writing style, but worth reading, perhaps even studying in a group together. It is not just for counselors or counselees... I think everyone could benefit.
Quote: (p. 151-2)
"You have known fractures and enmity in relationships, and sometimes you feel helpless to do anything about them. At other times you don't want to do anything about them. But if you have known God's power in such a way that you, an outcast, have been accepted, you will want to invite others to peace with God and peace with other people.
"Peacemakers renounce violence and vigilante strategies. They renounce them even at the level of their imaginations. They don't wish evil on others in private but play nice in public. It sounds impossible, especially if you have had an enemy. But it makes complete sense when you remember that you were an outsider and an enemy when Jesus brought you in and said, "Peace to you."
"How you actually function as a peacemaker is not always easy to determine. But we know this: shamed people feel powerless, and what could be more powerful than being an agent of peace in the midst of war? What could be more powerful than disarming someone with love? Peacemaking is, indeed, an honorable profession.
"If anyone knows shame, it is the wife of a cocaine addict. Her husband chose a drug over her. A drug - not even another human being. Now add the accessories of betrayal- the lies, empty promises, lost jobs, mysterious disappearances of her jewelry, all done in full view of family and friends. Peace seemed impossible, but she knew God's peace and she always looked for opportunities to express it.
"After a few months of his sobriety, she had a sense that he had gotten high, so she asked him about it. Apparently, he had made some changes because this time he told her the truth, even though he knew it might cost him what was left of his marriage.
"He could never have predicted her response: 'What will we do about this?'
"'We!' Peacemakers pursue unity in relationships. They think in terms of 'we', not only 'you.'
"It was the last time he got high, and that was ten years ago.
"Peacemaking is a powerful and honorable profession, indeed.
"Yet peacemakers are not always successful. Neither peacemaking in general nor a kingdom lifestyle in general will always win you points with others. In other words, the way of honor is not by expert peacemaking but by being connected to the King. ......."
(Visit this link for all my book reviews http://tim223.xanga.com/category/book-reviews/ )
Why God Calls Us To Dangerous Places, by Kate McCord
This is a beautiful, thought-provoking book, interwoven with stories from her experiences of 9 years in Afghanistan. Why do we go (or support those who go)? Primarily, because God loves those people, and His love begins to transform us so that we begin to love them too. She has great insights about loss, PTSD, ministry burnout, etc... great insights on how to rest in God and be at peace when all around you comes crashing down, when your friends die (or are murdered), when you are threatened, etc. When terrorists plot to attack us and do attack us, may our heart be that described in this book. So far opposite from "let's nuke them all", let our heart instead be, "Who will go to tell them about the love of Jesus?" See also my previous review of her (excellent) book "In the Land of Blue Burqas".
The 5 Love Languages, by Gary Chapman
You've probably heard of this book, even if you haven't read it. I finally got around to reading it. I was afraid that it was going to be oversimplistic... but it was not. His main point is that people experience 'feeling loved' in very different ways (words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch), and that husbands and wives need to learn how to speak the other's love language. He explains how he 'discovered' each one by various conversations with his clients (he is a professional counselor). He includes lots of stories, including about those whose marriages were falling apart. He is a Christian, but keeps most of the book 'generic' and secular... until the last chapter or so, when he explains about Christ's love. Excellent, worth reading, overall.
The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert, by Rosaria Champagne Butterfield
This is the true story of how a very liberal and atheistic woman found Christ. She explains her journey into identifying as a lesbian, and her journey to become an English professor at Syracuse University, teaching Gay and Lesbian Studies. She happened to become connected with a caring Christian, who took the time to invite her to dialog regularly about matters of faith over dinner with himself and his wife. Through this friendship, she reevaluated Christ and the Bible, and eventually came to believe in Christ. This began to massively change her lifestyle, as she chronicles. Later in her life, she became married, became an adoptive/foster mom, and homeschooled her children. This is a beautiful, well-written, testimony... well worth reading.
The Verbally Abusive Relationship, by Patricia Evans
This book discusses relationships (primarily husband-wife) where one person (typically, but not always, the husband) verbally abuses the other person. Most of the book is focused on description (and true stories). She categories all people as holding to either a "Power-over" mindset or a "Personal power" mindset, which is rather simplistic, but there is some value in the distinction. (The "Power-over" mindset perfectly describe the consequences of the Fall that the Bible discusses in Genesis 3:16.) Chapter 11 and 12 have some great, helpful, advice on how to respond to abuse in a way that will hopefully cause the abuser to notice the problem and begin to change. Basically, 'set limits'/'boundaries' in your own mind before the abuse happens (for example, 'I will not allow him to yell at me', or 'I will not allow him to demean me'), and then if it happens, respond forcefully 'Cut it out', or 'I will not accept that sort of speech', or, walk away. In cases of physical abuse, of course, flee. Chapter 13 on recovery is also good. Convicting for all to read, and helpful if (/when) we have friends going through this type of marital stress, to be able to provide support and counsel. Worth reading (or at least skimming, chapters 1, 11, 12, 13). However, sadly, it is completely secular... so unable to discuss the powerful wisdom from Ephesians, etc. Eggerichs' "Love and Respect" is more helpful in this area, and also even "For Men Only"/"For Women Only" by the Feldhahns (even though the latter mostly restrains itself to secular points).
And the Word Came With Power, by Joanne Shetler and Patricia Purvis
Powerful true story(ies) of how the Bible was translated for the Balangao people in the Philippines. She shares many stories from her life there. Especially powerful were all the times when God brought about events that she thought were catastrophic, but actually turned out for the best. She prayed for the salvation of her host family for a LONG time, and nothing happened. But eventually, they became believers in Jesus, and became powerful proponents of the gospel. Also fascinating to hear about the confrontations between the evil spirits and the Spirit of God in the Christians. Highly recommended book.
The Post-Church Christian: dealing with the generational baggage of our faith, by J. Paul Nyquist and Carson Nyquist
This book very well exposes and airs the reactionary complaints that millenials have against the 'institutionalized', 'tradition-bound', 'organized-religion', 'overprotective', 'cultural-christianity', 'anti-homosexual', 'judgmental', 'overly-political', 'hypocritical', Church (as they consider it).
Unfortunately, the response that J.Paul Nyquist tries to give to his son is rather weak. He basically says 'try to be understanding to us (the older Christians), give us the benefit of the doubt, cut us some slack, understand our historical context'. But our response should be to go back to Jesus, that iconoclastic, 'have you never read the scriptures' Man.
Typical paragraph from the book: "Thirty years ago, the American evangelical church member would never dream of being caught in a bar. Today, churches are being planted there. Amid the social environment found in pubs, we see opportunities to express the hope of Christ to those who enjoy a pint as they talk about life."
Their main takeaway points: don't give up on the church. Increase authenticity, yes, sure, fine. Remove excessive linkages between "God and country", sure. Remove unbiblical legalism, yes by all means. But don't throw out the Church - it has an important God-given function. With this point, I agree.
You and Me Forever, by Francis and Lisa Chan
The Chans discuss marriage in this book, but first, they discuss putting Jesus at the center and top priority of one's life. That is their main point... to stop focusing so much on marriage or singleness, and focus more on the kingdom of God in whatever station of life. Since they are themselves married, it comes across as slightly tone-deaf to the struggles singles have, however, their bracing 'focus on Jesus'/'put His kingdom first' message is important and needed and overall Biblical. They make much of Paul's instructions in 1 Cor. 7, and other passages. They also generally live out what they preach, enhancing their message's impact. Good book, a little strident at times, but worth reading and pondering.
Seven Marks of a New Testament Church, by David Alan Black
Excellent short book (only 50 pages). He talks about these "7 marks"- Evangelistic preaching, Christian baptism, apostolic teaching, genuine relationships, Christ-centered gatherings, fervent prayer, sacrificial living, based on Acts 2.
Tactics, by Gregory Koukl
Excellent book. When people hear of 'tactics' in the context of apologetics, most millenials are turned off because they assume it's about manipulation and argumentation, which they want to avoid. Instead, Koukl presents ways of using questions to turn around conversations that start out with someone asking you a hostile question related to your faith, so that you can expose the deeper beliefs underlying the question, and move into a respectful, healthy, dialog. This book is worth reading over and over, and practicing its contents, not for the purpose of manipulation, but for the sake of truly loving our neighbors, and helping them find out the awesome truth about Jesus.
From Heaven He Came and Sought Her
This book is a collection of essays about Particular Atonement ("Limited Atonement"). It thoroughly covers the historical views of the Church in the past centuries, and then gets into the Scriptural/theological discussion. It's a tough, slow, closely-reasoned read, but worth slogging through.
The Genesis Account, by Jonathan Safarti
This is a scientific and theological commentary on Genesis 1-11. It is a very thorough, even, solid, well-documented, well-reasoned, and objective commentary. As a reference book, it's not for light reading (some of Sarfati's other books like "Refuting Evolution" or "Refuting Compromise" are easier to read), but it's well worth slowly reading. It covers all the major scientific evidences for/against various age theories of the earth and evolution, and all the current and past hermeneutical interpretations of Genesis 1-11. Excellent.
Cold Case Christianity, A Homicide Detective Investigates The Claims of the Gospels, by J. Warner Wallace
This is an awesome book. It focuses on whether the gospel accounts (Matthew, Mark, Luke, John) about Jesus are accurate or not. The author was an atheist until his thirties, and a homicide detective who specialized in solving cold cases (unsolved crimes from decades past). When he began to investigate the gospel accounts, he realized that they have all the marks of true eyewitness accounts. This book covers the same historical facts as many other apologetics books (Josh McDowell, etc), but is extremely well-written, and with a fresh perspective.
Debating Darwin's Doubt, edited by David Klinghoffer
This book is basically a collection of online articles written as back-and-forth debate followup to Steven Meyer's "Darwin's Doubt". It discusses the major objections of all the critics, and offers rebuttal. It is a little hard to read, and a little repetitive, but overall a good, very solid and thorough, rebuttal of the critics' arguments and confirmation that Meyer's basic point was correct: the sudden appearance of Cambrian animals in the fossil layer cannot be explained through Darwinian/neoDarwinian evolution, nor through any other non-intelligent materialistic causes. An Intelligent Designer is the proper inference to the Cambrian fossil record.
Jesus gave Christians the task of "making disciples":
"Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age." -- Matthew 28:19-20
Sometimes it is said that before sharing the good news about Jesus Christ with their friends and neighbors and coworkers, Christians need to "earn the right to be heard". This is also said of youth group leaders, foreign missionaries, etc. The concept is that one needs to first earn respect from one's colleagues and peers, or endear themselves somehow, after which one can share about Christ.
To what extent is this true?
If it is true, how long does one need to wait? What if the 'respect' and 'endearment' and close friendship never occurs? What if no one ever asks you "the reason for the hope that is within you"? Do you just keep quiet about Jesus Christ the rest of your life, waiting for that moment?
cf. 1 Peter 3:15, 2 Cor. 2:14-17, 5:18-21... what other Bible passages apply?
What would you do if you were in the following situation (it's not quite hypothetical...) ?
The company you work for has a "no-smoking anywhere on the premises" policy that just started a few months ago... Yet many of the employees, including some of your coworkers, but mostly employees and visitors you don't know, take smoking breaks throughout the day because they have some level of nicotine addiction, whether they admit it or not. The route you take to walk home for lunch brings you regularly past a little secluded corner of the property which is a favorite for smokers. When you thus walk by a group of smoking coworkers every day, do you:
The squished-from-both-sides husband: boss at work saying "Why aren't you performing well? Why aren't you putting in more time at work? Your job is at risk unless you are willing to put in some overtime like everyone else", while wife at home saying "You aren't spending time with me! You must not really love me! Why don't you love me?" Meanwhile the husband putting in the time at work in order to provide for his family because he loves them and wants to be a good provider, while getting excoriated for that very action by the one he loves... and in response to his wife's question "Do you really love me? Do you really want to spend time with me?" he thinks "Actually, you're making it very difficult for me to enjoy spending time with you, when all I can expect is lecturing and nagging and constant 'do you love me' questioning. Do I enjoy spending time with you right now? Honestly not. But I can't tell you that, because you'll freak out. Do I love you in the sense of wanting what is best for you and being fully committed to you whether you treat me nicely or not? Yes. I will remain faithful to you despite your nagging and pouting and the gentle friendship and temptation of many other beautiful women. But do I enjoy coming home to your sermonizing? No, honestly I do not."
Although I am not married, I am going through lots of 'training', perhaps, in the above scenarios and feelings, through current friends' situations. May God use the training for good in my life and others' lives in the future.
What do you all think about the common practice of giving people compliments on their appearance? ...whether their clothing style, their haircut, a particular tie or shirt or dress, or things that are genetic like one's smile or eye color...
What good do remarks of this sort do? I desire to be convinced that they are good, but I am not convinced yet.
I can easily see the appropriateness of such remarks between a husband and wife, as they serve to connect the two in "I like everything about you" sentiment. ... but for unmarried friends, how is it profitable?
Also, while I'm in the xanga-rant-ing mode, my friend Andre recently asked the question of why Christians would ever go swimming in mixed (male-female) company with bathing suits not covered by t-shirts and shorts - i.e., why Christians would put swimming comfort on a higher plane than modesty and helping their brothers/sisters not stumble. I think it's a really good question. "Because everyone else does it" is not an acceptable answer. I think I will try to move in this direction myself... if you see me swimming in mixed company without a shirt, call me out about it.
Thinking today about the difference between David's "faith" and the "faith" of Hananiah, Mishael and Azariah.
The former:
20So David arose early in the morning and left the flock with a keeper and took the supplies and went as Jesse had commanded him. And he came to the circle of the camp while the army was going out in battle array shouting the war cry.
21Israel and the Philistines drew up in battle array, army against army.
22Then David left his baggage in the care of the baggage keeper, and ran to the battle line and entered in order to greet his brothers.
23As he was talking with them, behold, the champion, the Philistine from Gath named Goliath, was coming up from the army of the Philistines, and he spoke these same words; and David heard them.
24When all the men of Israel saw the man, they fled from him and were greatly afraid.
25The men of Israel said, "Have you seen this man who is coming up? Surely he is coming up to defy Israel. And it will be that the king will enrich the man who kills him with great riches and will give him his daughter and make his father's house free in Israel."
26Then David spoke to the men who were standing by him, saying, "What will be done for the man who kills this Philistine and takes away the reproach from Israel? For who is this uncircumcised Philistine, that he should taunt the armies of the living God?"
...
31When the words which David spoke were heard, they told them to Saul, and he sent for him.
32David said to Saul, "Let no man's heart fail on account of him; your servant will go and fight with this Philistine."
33Then Saul said to David, "You are not able to go against this Philistine to fight with him; for you are but a youth while he has been a warrior from his youth."
34But David said to Saul, "Your servant was tending his father's sheep. When a lion or a bear came and took a lamb from the flock,
35I went out after him and attacked him, and rescued it from his mouth; and when he rose up against me, I seized him by his beard and struck him and killed him.
36"Your servant has killed both the lion and the bear; and this uncircumcised Philistine will be like one of them, since he has taunted the armies of the living God."
37And David said, "The LORD who delivered me from the paw of the lion and from the paw of the bear, He will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine " And Saul said to David, "Go, and may the LORD be with you."
...
41Then the Philistine came on and approached David, with the shield-bearer in front of him.
42When the Philistine looked and saw David, he disdained him; for he was but a youth, and ruddy, with a handsome appearance.
43The Philistine said to David, "Am I a dog, that you come to me with sticks?" And the Philistine cursed David by his gods.
44The Philistine also said to David, "Come to me, and I will give your flesh to the birds of the sky and the beasts of the field."
45Then David said to the Philistine, "You come to me with a sword, a spear, and a javelin, but I come to you in the name of the LORD of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have taunted.
46"This day the LORD will deliver you up into my hands, and I will strike you down and remove your head from you. And I will give the dead bodies of the army of the Philistines this day to the birds of the sky and the wild beasts of the earth, that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel,
47and that all this assembly may know that the LORD does not deliver by sword or by spear; for the battle is the LORD'S and He will give you into our hands."
1 Samuel 17
The latter:
14Nebuchadnezzar responded and said to them, "Is it true, Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego, that you do not serve my gods or worship the golden image that I have set up?
15"Now if you are ready, at the moment you hear the sound of the horn, flute, lyre, trigon, psaltery and bagpipe and all kinds of music, to fall down and worship the image that I have made, very well. But if you do not worship, you will immediately be cast into the midst of a furnace of blazing fire; and what god is there who can deliver you out of my hands?"
16Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego replied to the king, "O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to give you an answer concerning this matter.
17"If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the furnace of blazing fire; and He will deliver us out of your hand, O king.
18"But even if He does not, let it be known to you, O king, that we are not going to serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up."
Dan 3:14-18
So David was like, "You have taunted the Lord's army and you are coming to fight against me the Lord's warrior, so you are going to die."
Meanwhile Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego were like, "We don't know if God will deliver us or not. But we will serve Him anyway regardless of whether He spares our lives or not."
Did David have "more faith" than Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego? Is one attitude more appropriate than the other? Or is the difference due to the circumstances? How was David so sure that God would deliver him? Because there are certainly examples in which God did NOT deliver His representatives in this life. (However, everything will be made right at the heavenly judgment.) E.g. Uriah:
20Indeed, there was also a man who prophesied in the name of the LORD, Uriah the son of Shemaiah from Kiriath-jearim; and he prophesied against this city and against this land words similar to all those of Jeremiah.
21When King Jehoiakim and all his mighty men and all the officials heard his words, then the king sought to put him to death; but Uriah heard it, and he was afraid and fled and went to Egypt.
22Then King Jehoiakim sent men to Egypt: Elnathan the son of Achbor and certain men with him went into Egypt.
23And they brought Uriah from Egypt and led him to King Jehoiakim, who slew him with a sword and cast his dead body into the burial place of the common people.
Jeremiah 26:20-23
Many more Biblical examples could be considered where "God's man (or woman)" was faced with huge / life-threatening situations and 'the glory of God's name' was put 'at risk' or 'on display for God to exalt'. Most of the situations involving specific recorded prayers for deliverance were answered, like Moses at the Red Sea and in the desert without water, Jacob before Esau's arrival, David fleeing from Saul, Hezekiah besieged by Sennacherib, etc. Some situations involved defeat/death - e.g. the transition of Hebrews 11 from "successful" heros of the faith to "martyred"/"unsuccessful" heros of the faith in verse 35. And Jesus Himself - fervently asking God to spare Him from death "if possible" / if there was any other way. Yet God said "no". (though Hebrews 5:7 says "In the days of His flesh, He offered up both prayers and supplications with loud crying and tears to the One able to save Him from death, and He was heard because of His piety"...?) The situation with the church in Acts praying for Peter's deliverance is fascinating - they were praying for his deliverance, and God sent an angel to spring him out of jail, then when he showed up at the door they didn't believe that it was him!
And how does this apply to us today? If I am faced with very large challenges at my workplace, ought I to have "David-faith": "Since I am God's representative on the job here, He will give me success in this situation and put all my enemies to shame..." ? or ought I to have "Shadrach-faith": "I do not know if God will deliver me in this situation or allow me to be crushed/defeated/humiliated, but I will continue to serve Him either way, as long as He gives me breath."
Or am I asking the wrong questions?
More on the "fine line" - a brief paper I wrote five years ago in a class. I came across it again recently and thought others might enjoy reading it or might have some comments. It's included below.
I also hope to respond to some of the other comments I've gotten recently on previous posts, as soon as Xanga restores them.
This (see comments) is an interesting quote (from a chapter written by John Piper) from CBMW's "Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood" (p. 42)
I'm not necessarily defending or criticizing it at present, just posting it for your comments.
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