The ten books currently in my main reading pile besides the Bible are: "Love and Respect", "For Men Only", "Becoming Conversant with the Emergent Church", "Don't Waste Your Life", "The Young Man in the Mirror", "The Reason for God", "Philosophy and the Christian Faith", "The Reliability of the Gospels", "George Mueller", and the Book of Mormon.  Just because they're in my pile doesn't mean I read them frequently (ha! far from it actually), but some of the ideas on this blog are obviously stimulated by the things I read when I get a chance.  The Bible is by far the most important book though... I recommend it more than all the others... the Bible is food, the others are condiments, or even silverware.

I have realized just tonight why I value my journal and my blog so much, and why I desire my closest friends to read them and to get to know my friends from previous places - it is because of two facts: I have changed a lot during the years of my life, and I have lived in several very different environments in my life - a version of 'rootlessness'.  My journals and blogs (and photos and letters and other forms of history) form a sort of thread that ties together 'the real me' and help me (and potentially others) understand who I am in view of the entire collection of experiences and friends... I tend to believe (rightly or wrongly) that unless I or someone else grasp 'who I was', it is essentially impossible to understand 'who I am' right now, and 'who I am becoming'... and likewise I think the more one gets to know my true friends, the more one can understand me.  If someone would view my journals and blogs and friends as 'secondary/accessories' and decides they're not worth the time to digest or get to know, I would feel that the person is not truly interested in getting to know me. That ought not change how I view/treat them, of course, in general...

Tonight reading "Love and Respect" - powerful and highly recommended... it's based on Ephesians 5:33, with thesis that husbands need respect and wives need love.  I think I strongly agree, based on what I've seen.  I don't know if I'll ever get to apply it.   But what about singles?  Does it not seem that single Christian men cannot / ought-not to direct the natural flow of their love / romantic feelings toward their single Christian sisters? (unless God is leading them to pursue marriage, of course) ...because that would easily tend to stir up feelings in the girls that would be difficult to repress... feelings that would risk 'leading them on' even accidentally, without meaning to.  As the african proverb says, "If you are not interested in giving money to the beggar widow, do not ask her too many questions."  What then to do with these?  How ought single men to 'practice' loving their wives, as it were?  Certainly not to direct this toward married women, that would be very foolish.  It seems to me that these feelings and impulses must simply be buried, dumped, wasted.  Not to say that God overlooks it, of course... all of our tears are saved in His bottle, and likewise with all of our romantic love.  It's like a garden hose which has no 'off' valve, but has no garden to water.  All it can do is pour onto the asphalt and down into the drain.  But that's better than prematurely soaking the paper packets of seeds which are meant for other gardens.  The energy of single people can of course be turned toward positive 'projects', as it is well known that churches benefit from the extra time and resources and energy of single men and women... and missionary endeavors to far lands, etc.  To a limited degree the longing of single Christian men to lead and provide and the longing of single Christian women to care for and nurture others can be 'redirected' into small groups, others' families, etc. Yet somehow it doesn't seem that simple.  If Christian single men need respect/significance and Christian single women need love/security, who can they legitimately get it from?  From God, I suppose.  Whom do they practice on?  Ultimately no one, I suppose.  Yet 'friendships' are obviously important.

There's the example of Jesus... single all his thirty-odd years on earth, yet somehow building a DEEP friendship with Mary, Martha, and Lazarus, and others... especially Mary (John 11, etc)... while staying perfectly pure and sinless.  How could he intentionally build/allow such a deep friendship, while somehow making it clear to her that he had no romantic intentions toward her?  I wish I could watch His life in person.  E.g. Paul with the many women friends he mentions, Dorcas (great name for an American girl), etc.  May God give us all wisdom.  As the Quran says, "May God lead us to the straight path."

One more thing - I heard this awesome analogy from Piper's lecture on John Newton the other day - Newton used it in one of his sermons.

Imagine if there was a man who had just been told (and verified with official documents) that he had inherited a HUGE fortune [think billions or trillions].  All of his financial needs and wants would basically be solved for the rest of his life.  All he had to do was travel to a particular distant city to receive his inheritance.  He traveled and traveled, and finally, just when he was getting within five miles of the city, a wheel on his carriage broke [or his car broke an axle or something].

Imagine how utterly ridiculous it would be if we saw that man cursing and muttering darkly to himself as he walked the rest of the way, upset at the fact that he had to walk to the city and get all hot and sweaty and tired.  Or how utterly moronic we would think he was if he decided not to complete his trip because of the inconvenience!

Thus it is [says Newton] with our own situation (for those who are believers/disciples of Christ) - on our way to HEAVEN to live with GOD, FOREVER, joint heirs with Christ, bride of Christ, children of God, etc - when we encounter difficulties and sorrows and trials here...

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us... Romans 8:18

In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials... 1 Peter 1:6

For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison... 2 Corinthians 4:17

If you have a long commute and would be interested in listening to some messages...  http://www.wccc.net/blogs/gospelprism/virtual-m-div/

(I haven't listened to many of these, so I can't endorse them all... but it's definitely a source of thought-provoking material...)

Also, came across an interesting quote tonight:

In my experience, evangelical worship tends to be almost entirely praise oriented. But if one looks at the Psalms, the most common category is laments, psalms in which the worshipper pours out his complaint to God and prays for help and healing.
In our congregations there are many who come to worship bearing great pain in their souls, and they need the opportunity to express their woes to God. If the way is not clear for them to do so, they will feel even more excluded and cut off from their fellow worshippers and from God.

--Gordon Wenham, from http://themusickeplace.blogspot.com/, from another book

Have any of you read or listened to "The Pineapple Story" by Otto Koning?  It's a powerful listen... highly recommended... how a missionary and his wife gradually learned one simple lesson over and over in many different ways during their lives (and now try to help others learn it less painfully).

The lesson: Instead of trying to hold on to anything good in life, 'give it back to God' in the sense of telling God, "God, you can take this away if You choose- I will keep loving You anyway and seeking my happiness in You alone." *

I am learning this again myself these days in a particular situation.

* Notice the superficial similarity but deeper diametric opposition to Buddhism...  Buddha taught that one should renounce all desire - i.e. one should give up longing for anything/everything, because everything in life is transient and will be taken away.   But the Bible teaches that God Himself is the One Person whom it's good to long for... to deeply desire... to 'worship' in the most proper sense of the word.  C.S.Lewis writes about "sehnsucht"-longing in his oft-quoted words: "We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased."   Rather than renouncing all desire, we Christians are to give up lesser desires so that we "may take hold of that for which Christ Jesus has taken hold of" us -- i.e., knowing God Himself.

 Here are some more passages to think about along these lines:

For My people have committed two evils:
They have forsaken Me,
The fountain of living waters,
To hew for themselves cisterns,
Broken cisterns
That can hold no water.
Jeremiah 2:13

Now on the day when his sons and his daughters were eating and drinking wine in their oldest brother's house, a messenger came to Job and said, "The oxen were plowing and the donkeys feeding beside them, and the Sabeans attacked and took them. They also slew the servants with the edge of the sword, and I alone have escaped to tell you."

While he was still speaking, another also came and said, "The fire of God fell from heaven and burned up the sheep and the servants and consumed them, and I alone have escaped to tell you."

While he was still speaking, another also came and said, "The Chaldeans formed three bands and made a raid on the camels and took them and slew the servants with the edge of the sword, and I alone have escaped to tell you."

While he was still speaking, another also came and said, "Your sons and your daughters were eating and drinking wine in their oldest brother's house, and behold, a great wind came from across the wilderness and struck the four corners of the house, and it fell on the young people and they died, and I alone have escaped to tell you."

Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head, and he fell to the ground and worshiped.
He said,
"Naked I came from my mother's womb,
And naked I shall return there
The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away.
Blessed be the name of the LORD."
Through all this Job did not sin nor did he blame God.
Job 1:13-22 

But it greatly displeased Jonah and he became angry.
He prayed to the LORD and said, "Please LORD, was not this what I said while I was still in my own country? Therefore in order to forestall this I fled to Tarshish, for I knew that You are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abundant in lovingkindness, and one who relents concerning calamity. Therefore now, O LORD, please take my life from me, for death is better to me than life."

The LORD said, "Do you have good reason to be angry?"

Then Jonah went out from the city and sat east of it. There he made a shelter for himself and sat under it in the shade until he could see what would happen in the city. So the LORD God appointed a plant and it grew up over Jonah to be a shade over his head to deliver him from his discomfort. And Jonah was extremely happy about the plant.

But God appointed a worm when dawn came the next day and it attacked the plant and it withered. When the sun came up God appointed a scorching east wind, and the sun beat down on Jonah's head so that he became faint and begged with all his soul to die, saying, "Death is better to me than life."

Then God said to Jonah, "Do you have good reason to be angry about the plant?" And he said, "I have good reason to be angry, even to death."

Then the LORD said, "You had compassion on the plant for which you did not work and which you did not cause to grow, which came up overnight and perished overnight. Should I not have compassion on Nineveh, the great city in which there are more than 120,000 persons who do not know the difference between their right and left hand, as well as many animals?"
Jonah 4

"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.
Or what man is there among you who, when his son asks for a loaf, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, he will not give him a snake, will he?
If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him!"
Matthew 7:7-11

I was encouraged last night by reading Bruce Ware's book "God's Greater Glory", in two particular ways.

First, in view of the UN, the secular humanitarian organizations, the religious organizations, the imams, the conservative pundits, the popes, the presidents, the prime ministers, the congresses, the 'mighty MSM', the thinktanks, the human rights watch organizations, the environmental organizations, the universities, the liberals, the conservatives, the scientists, and all of the other elite's voices who stand for humanity's collective constant communique - the constant yelling of the world, demanding to be taken seriously at all times...

...in view of these, we read these amazing words in Psalm 2 -

He who sits in the heavens laughs,
The Lord scoffs at them.

It is so incredibly refreshing to see God, our Protector and Father, to whom we nervously look to see "how he's reacting", roaring with laughter in the face of the world's angsty hot air.  The King, the One In The Driver's Seat, is not worried in the slightest, about anything.  The 'immense dignity' and 'weighty maneuverings' and 'subtle schemes' of the nations and political strongmen are, to Him, nothing more than "a drop from a bucket" (Is. 40:15).   He is, certainly, "moved with compassion" (John 11).  But as for His own eventual victory and His opponents' constant threats and sophisms, He just laughs.   That's awesome.

Secondly and in a related vein, it's neat to ponder Acts 17 - "The God who made the world and all things in it, since He is Lord of heaven and earth, does not dwell in temples made with hands; nor is He served by human hands, as though He needed anything, since He Himself gives to all people life and breath and all things; and He made from one man every nation of mankind to live on all the face of the earth, having determined their appointed times and the boundaries of their habitation, that they would seek God, if perhaps they might grope for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us..."

Especially this phrase struck me - "...having determined their appointed times and the boundaries of their habitation..."

Ware points out the incredibleness of this statement.  Currently we may be anxious about Iran.  A few years ago, it was Iraq.  A few years before that, it was Russia.  Before that, it was Hitler's Germany.  Before that, it was Wilhelm's Germany.  Etc etc.   But the nations each have their "appointed times" and even appointed "boundaries"!   National struggles are not something to worry about, for a Christian - our Father has them all completely in control.  He is working out a masterplan, a great story, which we will someday look back on in awe.

Might as well start enjoying it now...